Lately, Adam and I have been speaking about religion and how, growing up, it always felt like our religion was under attack. The whole concept of religion is this belief of being the other…the chosen ones. While there is an amount of merit to that isolation, religion as we know it is always changing so those who practice it fervently or even casually, may feel it’s under attack. It’s not unique to any particular religion, though it can be truer for some than others at particular times in certain places. It took a trip to Barnes and Noble to hammer that point home for me. Continue reading →
I came to this country more than a decade ago. It’s become my second home and I hold it in very high regard. With this comes lots of constructive critique….just because I love the U.S. doesn’t mean I don’t look at it with honest eyes. It’s the home of our son. He will be a descendant of Trinidad but firstly, he will be American. I hope to make America better and better not by some nationalist ideology but by unpacking the shit that makes me the most uncomfortable and striving to be more open, more loving, kinder and more forgiving with everyone around me. So today, I say Happy Birthday to the country that has given me so much and taught me an immense amount about being a real, proper grown-up human. Continue reading →
I know kids obsess about things but seeing it up close is surreal. It’s all about guitars and big round objects, right now. If he sees a ball in public, game over. He must have it. He is super focused on getting it and will do whatever it takes. It super adorable and can be indicative of a persevering spirit, right?
And yes, I am having to find very creative ways to not use the plural noun for round objects children play with in order to keep it PC.
We talk about lots of serious stuff on this blog. It’s an outlet for us to share our journey as we raise our son. Sometimes, though, it’s important to just be. That’s often where Adam and I have the biggest struggles.
Our friends got married in the Catskills. We made it a weekend trip and there was so much GREEN!! It was so delightful to get away. Today, I am grateful for what a great travel companion our baby is. At 8pm, in the midst of the wedding, he calmly decided he wanted to sleep. We put him in the stroller and he fell fast asleep amid loud wedding music. He slept while we danced within eye-shot. At 11pm, we went to a friend’s house, put him to sleep in his pack and play in a bedroom and then hung out, listening to good music and relaxing, checking in on him every now and again. He woke up at 2am and we all went home and slept until 8am the next morning. I was almost sure he was going to wake up cranky the next day but he was his usual happy self. It is not lost on me how lucky we are to have a son that just goes with the flow. Granted, it takes a bit of planning to get to this point but it’s really not that much. Adam was the same way as a baby but I am pretty high-maintenance so I know it could’ve gone in that direction, as well. Today, I’m grateful for his sweet, gentle, easy-going disposition.
ADAM: Some of my best friends are black. Some of my best friends are Jewish. Those statements are supposed to somehow justify the next one which is usually along the lines of…”so I know how Jews are” or “so I know about the black experience”. Tabitha and I hear these statements from time to time and we bristle every single time. If you ever catch yourself about to say something like this, don’t. Continue reading →
It’s my second Mother’s Day with the baby and this one is more delightful than the last because he’s so much more interactive. He has changed my life in so many ways. Most of them are for the better. Some….debatable. Here are 5 ways this little person has changed my life.
He helped me prioritize my life. This past week, I spoke to Geri Stengel at Forbes Magazine about the struggles of juggling motherhood and running a business. Read the article here. When my little guy came into our lives, he had to compete with my first baby, my business. I started Tabii Just, a clothing line, in 2012, before we even thought about having a baby. When the real baby came along, I struggled for months trying to balance the two. Both were ever present and needed constant attention. Only one would be emotionally scarred if I checked out. Continue reading →
So even in my attempt to be grateful in my last post, I was still throwing shade to the person who inspired me to do this. This positivity thing is super hard. Here goes Day 2.
Today, I am grateful that on a nice day, Adam, the baby and I took a peaceful walk on the boardwalk. I have a really big meeting on Thursday and lots of prep to do but I realized that there will always be work. There will always be deadlines. Sure enough, it was worth it. The baby wanted to hold Mommy’s hand in one hand and Daddy’s in the other. When either of us let go, he would freak out. He wanted to just walk down the boardwalk like this. It really hit home for me how impactful the dynamic between Adam and I is for him. Even though he doesn’t verbally express it, it affects him when we are together, not stressed out and not working. This solidified the importance of having an attitude of gratitude even more because I am already seeing how my temperament is affecting him.
Passover is almost here. Bagels are not kosher for Passover, but curry is. Discuss.
In a mixed family, holidays are both amazing and tough. They are amazing because we get to share traditions with each other and create new traditions as a family. We love our families, so getting together for holidays is fantastic. The baby loves his cousins and aunties and uncles and Nana and Grandma and Grandpa(s).
That’s the easy part.
Adam: Holidays are tough because Tabitha and I have expectations of each other, some of which are spoken, some of which are assumed, but all of which are steeped in years of experiencing our own traditions. Continue reading →